Ninety-eight per cent of laughter is nothing to do with jokes which do not deserve to bear the weight of all the funny stuff in the world.

I don't deserve this award but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.

I no doubt deserved my enemies but I don't believe I deserved my friends.

It is important to our friends to believe that we are unreservedly frank with them and important to friendship that we are not.

The men and women who serve in our military have won for us every hour we live in freedom sometimes at the expense of the very hours of the lifetimes they had hoped to live.

I think that we could be more careful about what we're saying to young women in terms of their expectations. It's unrealistic to expect people to always be in designer clothes. Girls growing up deserve more freedom in how they look and how they feel about how they look.

You have spent many lives and much treasure to bring freedom to many lands that were reluctant to receive it. And here you have a people who won it by themselves and need only the help to preserve it.

All my life Americans have been accustomed to thinking of theirs as 'the richest freest' country in the world. By most measurements it was long a contender for that honor and - among the larger countries if equal weight were given to wealth and indices of freedom - probably did deserve to be so described.

My daughters your daughters our daughters deserve safety protection and the freedom to make their own choices about their personal lives and their physical selves.

Strong generous and confident she has nobly served mankind. Beware how you trifle with your marvellous inheritance this great land of ordered liberty for if we stumble and fall freedom and civilization everywhere will go down in ruin.