No great movement designed to change the world can bear to be laughed at or belittled. Mockery is a rust that corrodes all it touches.

The Chinese government wants me to say that for many centuries Tibet has been part of China. Even if I make that statement many people would just laugh. And my statement will not change past history. History is history.

I'm addicted to laughing. I go to see a lot of comedy shows. I'm addicted to playing really loud and obnoxious rock music in my car. I'm addicted to beautiful clothes and shoes. I just love gorgeous stuff and work hard to acquire pretty things shiny things. I'm addicted to shiny things!

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance but nobody laughed.

A couple of months ago I was down in Florida for the Food and Wine Festival. And this journalist grabbed me and said 'How does it feel to be a TV guy? You're no longer in the restaurant business.' And I laughed. I asked him 'How long do you think it takes me to do a season?' He said 'Well 200 days.' And I was like '200 days? Try 20!'

Really I have to laugh because there was a whole set of stories that made me sound like the Dragon Lady you know 'tough this and tough that.' Then there is this business about 'gooey.' The bottom line is I am a pragmatic idealist.

I love making people laugh and feel good and that's awesome and special for me to be able to do that but there really is nothing like kicking ass whether it's on a major scale or whether it's in more of a dramatic fashion. Being physical and taking care of business the old-fashioned way is something that I love doing.

He who laughs most learns best.

The best book like the best speech will do it all - make us laugh think cry and cheer - preferably in that order.

Laughter is the best medicine - unless you're diabetic then insulin comes pretty high on the list.