I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'

All the world is birthday cake so take a piece but not too much.

Every year on your birthday you get a chance to start new.

I think at a child's birth if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift that gift should be curiosity.

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to remember it once.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

Being fired was the best luck of my life. It made me stop and reflect. It was the birth of my life as a writer.

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.

About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.

Beauty is the still birth of suffering every woman knows that.