I guess something that I've noticed from American acts who had success in touring is more of an explanation as to their music. Which is I think quite funny. I think British acts might like to leave more to the imagination - maybe a bit more obscure perhaps - a bit more shy.

My mother was making $135 a week but she had resilience and imagination. She might take frozen vegetables cook them with garlic onion and Spam and it would taste like a four-star dinner.

George has only got to ring me. His imagination is so wonderful I'd do any character he might create.

Democratic politicians have disliked things I've written Republican politicians... if they all love you you might as well be driving a Good Humor truck.

I think that some books are more successful than others to certain readers. People who read my books for the humor they're going to love one book. People who read my books for the mystery they might not like that book quite as much.

A lot of my humor centers on the act of telling jokes and I think this can prevent certain audiences from suspending their feeling of disbelief. It might piss a few people off but I can't help it.

Athletes tend to have less of a sense of humor than most people. They are heroes to so many. That might be part of it.

I've always chosen my band members based on their sense of humor. It might sound stupid but it means not only are they fun to live with on a tour bus for years but humor implies intelligence.

Since the goal of my programs is to show audiences how humor can both help them heal as well as deal with not-so-funny stuff I decided to discuss the events of the previous week the pain all of us were feeling and how humor and some laughter might be beneficial.

If I ever have sex with someone I might be able to develop a sense of humor.