Never put a sock in a toaster.

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

There is a bright spot or two for the Spaniards. French toast has become freedom toast on the Air Force One breakfast menu but the Spanish omelet is still a Spanish omelet.

St. Louis has a lot of weird food customs that you don't see other places - and a lot of great ethnic neighborhoods. There's a German neighborhood. A great old school Italian neighborhood with toasted ravioli which seems to be a St. Louis tradition. And they love provolone cheese in St. Louis.

I like to use 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' on my toast in the morning because sometimes when I eat breakfast I like to be incredulous. How was breakfast? Unbelievable.

Most 'reality' shows aren't reality at all. They're game shows with no prize. Like 'Rock of Love.' His aren't genuine feelings. Then again Bob Barker didn't really care whether or not you won the toaster. Sorry to shatter everyone's dreams.

For four to six months at a time I would barely eat. I lived on a diet of Melba toast carrots and black coffee.

I think we've been dulled by capitalism. We're just blobs now - we're so worried about how we can keep paying the lease on the car the mortgage the lease on the toaster and all that. You can't really think about much else. If you lose that you lose the whole lot.

I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.