Even though the future seems far away it is actually beginning right now.

Everything seems fine until you're about 40. Then something is definitely beginning to go wrong. And you look in the mirror with your old habit of thinking 'While I accept that everyone grows old and dies it's a funny thing but I'm an exception to that rule.'

I'm not a movie guy I'm not a TV sitcom guy but whatever seems to fit and is funny is good for me.

I think I have a dark view of the world. I have to make everything funny otherwise it all seems so sad.

Marie Antoinette was funny I'm sure she was just misinterpreted. You know the 'Let them eat cake' line. She seems like she was kind of funny like a Chelsea Handler or Kathy Griffin type.

I can't not find humor in elements of most parts of life but at the same time nothing ever seems perpetually funny to me.

Women's humor seems to be a little more supportive. It's just kind of trying to make the other one laugh through funny voices and kind of talking about other people. I respond to that. I feel less like I'm going to get beat up in a room full of women than I do in a room full of guys.

Hemingway seems to be in a funny position. People nowadays can't identify with him closely as a member of their own generation and he isn't yet historical.

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

It seems to me that trying to live without friends is like milking a bear to get cream for your morning coffee. It is a whole lot of trouble and then not worth much after you get it.