I look back to when I got divorced in the late 1970s. When that happened I was so broken up. After that I decided to seek God for my life and my next marriage.

People ask what the secret of a happy marriage is. If there is one it's 'don't talk about it.'

So I really did stop and change what I saw I was about and really try to put that principle into play as the center of everything - my friendships my marriage my career my family my way of being in the world. And that changed everything for me.

When I first started talking about gay marriage most people in the gay community looked at me as if I was insane or possibly a fascist reactionary.

My own early crusade for same-sex marriage for example is now mainstream gay politics. It wasn't when I started.

I believe in the sanctity of marriage.

At my core what I think we need to do is to get the basics right again. We need to rebuild our family structure stay away from redefining marriage and stand by marriage as a union between a man and a woman.

I was one of 14 senators to vote against the Defense of Marriage Act. I thought it was a harsh and unnecessary thing to do to people across this country who care enough about each other to want to be married.

It was the courts of course that took away prayer from our schools that took away Bible reading from our schools. It's the courts that gave us same-sex marriage. So it is quite a battlefield and the Supreme Court is the highest court in the land.

Gay marriage has jumped out of the closet on to the front page. Everyone from the president of the U.S. to retired four-star general Colin Powell is embracing the issue now supported by most Americans. Still a few people like former First Lady Laura Bush appear to be conflicted.