Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out you haven't wasted the whole day.

I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love just those who've had luck with it and those who haven't.

I haven't understood a bar of music in my life but I have felt it.

You know what your problem is it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all of life's riddles are answered in the movies.

I haven't lived a perfect life. I have regrets. But that's from a lifetime of taking chances making decisions and trying not to be frozen. The only thing that I can do with my regrets is understand them.

Babies don't need a vacation but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby and say 'What are you doing here? You haven't worked a day in your life!'

I really haven't had that exciting of a life. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. I'd rather tell a story about somebody else.

I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.

These are people who haven't gone through the legal means to becoming citizens like our forefathers did. They want all the benefits but none of the responsibilities.

Pop songs are not as graceful as they used to be. Performers today haven't gone through the regimen of learning how to write. And of course everyone wants to own copyrights.