It's true you can never eat a pet you name. And anyway it would be like a ventriloquist eating his dummy.
My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.
Mind you I've always been a very off-message type of fat broad one who gladly admits she reached the size she is now solely through lack of discipline and love of pleasure and who rather despises people (except those with proven medical conditions) who pretend that it is generally otherwise.