The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss.

As all of us with any involvement in sports knows no two umpires or no two referees have the same strike zone or call the same kind of a basketball game.

Many baseball fans look upon an umpire as a sort of necessary evil to the luxury of baseball like the odor that follows an automobile.

Take pride in your work at all times. Remember respect for an umpire is created off the field as well as on.

Peace is the umpire for doing the will of God.

Baseball is a game where a curve is an optical illusion a screwball can be a pitch or a person stealing is legal and you can spit anywhere you like except in the umpire's eye or on the ball.

My dad was a carpenter and I would work with him during the summer and umpire on the nights I wasn't playing.

As a whole the managers today are different in temperament. Most have very good communication skills and are more understanding of the umpire's job. That doesn't mean they are better managers. It just means that I perceive today's managers a bit differently.

Now that women are jockeys baseball umpires atomic scientists and business executives maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

If either player abandon the game by quitting the table in anger or in an otherwise offensive manner or by momentarily resigning the game or refuses to abide by the decision of the Umpire the game must be scored against him.