Daddy loves you but he smacks you and he can shout at you and smash things but Daddy still loves you. So when you get into a relationship with someone who does all of that why would it be unusual?
A negative judgment gives you more satisfaction than praise provided it smacks of jealousy.
For a competitive junkie like me golf is a great solution because it smacks you in the face every time you think you have accomplished something. That to me has taken over a lot of the energy and competitiveness for basketball.