When I've gone back to work it's always with that sense of inevitability. That may be a complete delusion but it's the one that I need to get out of bed and go about my business. That sense that I can't avoid this thing. I better just get on with it.

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So on May 1 1987 at Gary's invitation I agreed to see him one last time - to confront him face-to-face about his sincerity and with the intention of ending our brief relationship.